


[Trancy, Alois]

by orphan_account



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Gen, I Don't Even Know, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-20
Updated: 2015-07-20
Packaged: 2018-04-10 08:50:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4385567
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Perhaps the words “defence mechanism” come to mind and if. they. do. then. you're not far off the mark.</p><p>In which Alois Trancy is. And is not.</p>
            </blockquote>





	[Trancy, Alois]

**Author's Note:**

> Can I call this a character study? Abstract poetry? A test?
> 
> One thing's for sure, it's based heavily off this novel my dear friend let me borrow. [[BOND, JAMES]: alphabet, anatomy, [auto]biography](http://www.amazon.com/BOND-JAMES-alphabet-anatomy-biography/dp/1933996250) is the title and if you haven't read it, I'd certainly recommend giving it a look.

**Approximate number of times [Trancy, Alois]**

screams and cries, 18; screams without crying, 3; cries without screaming, 9; wishes he could wash away his sins, 1;  
drinks too much wine, 4; allows Claude to think he's drunk too much wine so his butler will carry him to bed, [10? 20?]; smiles as Claude carries him to bed, 4;  
laughs just to try and annoy Claude, [too many to count]; feigns laughter to hide an insecurity, 14; felt insecure, [40?];  
sleeps soundly, 6; sleeps troubled by only a few nightmares, 12; sleeps the light sleep of a boy who knows his days are numbered, 23; pretends to sleep but doesn't, 5;  
hides fear behind laughter, 13; hides fear behind rage, 9; hides fear behind desperation, 26; just hides, 4;  
speaks to Ciel Phantomhive, [not enough]; is annoyed with Claude, 39; considers hitting Hannah, 38; hits Hannah, 11;  
contemplates his own death, 28; considers suicide, 2; contemplates suicide in relation to Claude, [1?]; contemplates death in general, 5;  
says goodbye to Luca before it's to late, 0

 

 

 

**Beguile [Trancy, Alois]**

_charm or enchant (someone), sometimes in a deceptive way_ Perhaps the words “defence mechanism” come to mind and if. they. do. then. you're not far off the mark.

Alois Trancy has frozen in the wasteland that is his own rage since before he became Alois Trancy, since back when he was a-boy-called-Jim, heart in his chest, brother dead. He might have called himself _unlucky_ were he enough of an optimist to consider things like luck to be _factors_ at all. Instead he simply sought to make things better. For him. For him. For himself.

Turned himself to ice, then chipped away at everything he couldn't use, turned himself sacred in his own hands, built himself a life that could be his, worked his way through an old pervert to do so and now it's _his_ , a life he earned, because he'd have settled for no other, fighting the old man and Sebastian Michaelis (or having Claude do it) because he can't figure out a better way to climb out of his own mess-of-feeling.

Lesser people would have died in his place. He sold his soul for a chance to live. He made a feast from his own soul (soul, flesh, bone, whatever Claude wants) for this, and offered it up.

 

 

 

**Claude Faustus in relation to [Trancy, Alois]**

Alois calls him _Claude_ when they meet, and it's a joke. Almost.

Claude Faustus the terrible, Claude Faustus the beautiful, Claude Faustus the demon, Claude Faustus the butler-- and it's not until later that Alois seems to consider the way the name _Claude_ falls from his tongue with more ease than anything, how he calls out for Claude when the lights go out.

Luca is gone and Luca is gone and Luca is gone and

(skip ahead, two steps forward, then one back, like a dance, _onetwothree onetwothree_ )

“What is your wish?”

(no, before that)

And what does he want, and what does he want? Is it worth it? Oh. Yes. Maybe it is. Jim has never sold his soul before, he's not sure what the process is like.

 

 

 

**Dislikes [Trancy, Alois]**

_~~hates,~~ displays aversion to:_               Sebastian Michaelis   _ALSO_ excuses, boredom, the colour gold   _ALSO_ the village   _ALSO_ memory, his own blood, feelings of inadequacy   _ALSO_ loneliness, tears, screaming, shaking, laughter when it's not his, blood when it is his   _ALSO_ Claude, Hannah (but not: Claude, Hannah)   _ALSO_ Ciel Phantomhive   _ALSO_ being mocked   _ALSO_  nightmares, fire, the dark, the late Lord Trancy   _ALSO_ dogs   _ALSO_ forgetting, failing, falling, following   _ALSO_ dying

 

 

 

**Ephemeral [Trancy, Alois]**

_lasting for only a short time; most physical pain falls into this, or so someone told you_ Alois Trancy is: ever-changing, emotions flickering like candlelight. Think: bright eyes, the differences between him and his brother, his brother, what his brother could have become, what _he_ could have become, a little boy, a boy who made a deal with a demon, a demon, a boy whose soul is up for grabs, the space between himself and Ciel Phantomhive, splintered glass, a smile, the way Hannah listens, the way Claude grimaces, the way Luca smiled, time alone, the concept of “self.”

Alois Trancy is: all of that.

 

 

 

**Filament [Trancy, Alois]**

_what **could** have been, answer: [Y] for “yes, likely” or [N] for “no, unlikely”_

__ 1) “I killed him for love,” Claude says, and he means it. Alois gets his soul eaten by his butler and Ciel Phantomhive dies, Alois has what he wanted.

__ 2) He is found. There are no fairies, no demons. Luca is dead, Jim is not.

__ 3) Alois hurls the teapot at Hannah's head. The glass shatters. It doesn't matter.

__ 4) Claude wins, Sebastian loses. Ciel Phantomhive is a demon. Hannah loves him, Claude loves him. Sebastian has nothing. Alois has everything.

__ 5) Jim Macken dies of infection. There is no Alois Trancy.

__ 6) Alois Trancy is killed by Ciel Phantomhive during the climax of their duel. Life goes on, and very little changes.

__ 7) Ciel Phantomhive becomes his.

__ 8) Alois wins. Something.

__ 9) Alois loves Ciel, and does not do him harm. After all, they are so alike.

__ 10) He bleeds out on the floor. Claude does not help him. Everything is ruined.

__ 11) “It was out of love.”

 

 

 

**Grotesque [Trancy, Alois]**

_he is not Ciel Phantomhive, see:_ hair, taste in tea, opinion of self, eyes (eye), colour of soul, aptitude for running a household, skin, clothing, urge to be loved, scars, nails, family, poise, demeanour, swordsmanship, contract

 

 

 

**Having lost one's bearings [Trancy, Alois]**

Telling himself it matters swiftly becomes all Alois has, promises made by himself and to himself and for himself, that all he has lost can amount to something if he can avenge it.

Find Claude. Apologise to Luca. Embrace Hannah. Protect Luca (no, can't do that, he's gone). Find a target, take out grief on target. Find Sebastian, take Ciel from Sebastian, kill Sebastian, kill Claude, kill yourself. Love Claude, be loved by Claude, get Hannah to get Sebastian to kill Claude, kill everyone. Kill yourself. no no nonononono

 

 

 

**Idyllic [Trancy, Alois]**

_please fill in [Y] for “yes, this would be better” or [N] for “no, this would not be better”_

__ 1) someone helps Alois Trancy

__ 2) Alois Trancy is loved

__ 3) Alois Trancy stops wanting

__ 4) Alois Trancy needs space but he attached himself to Claude at the lips, right where his tongue stops, his own lips, never Claude's lips

__ 5) something sharp goes straight through Ciel Phantomhive's eye

__ 6) the boy gets to live

__ 7) “the boy” meaning Alois Trancy, meaning Ciel Phantomhive

__ 8) “help me”

__ 9) Alois Trancy stops bleeding

__ 10) Alois Trancy gets Claude to say everything will be all right, to promise Alois he loves him, to pretend he loved him, to pretend that pretending is enough, but instead Claude _told the truth_

__ 11) something sharp goes straight through Claude's body, how dare he not ask Alois to forgive him

__ 12) it depends on who you ask

 

 

 

**Judgments based on preconceptions regarding [Trancy, Alois]**

_connect the noun with the most relevant descriptor_

1) his smile                                                              a) like a razor's edge

2) his brother's corpse                                             b) gone

3) his “father's” corpse                                             c) irrelevant

4) his tea                                                                 d) as cold as ice

5) his soul                                                               e) angry

6) his eyes                                                               f) tangible and terrible

7) his own corpse                                                    g) worth more than Claude had estimated

8) his butler                                                            h) deceptive but convincing

 

 

**Killed [Trancy, Alois]**

_it was all done **to** him_

 

 

 

**Lullaby, or: ways that [Trancy, Alois] decieves himself and others**

_eagerly, impulsively, frequently, deliberately, frantically, angrily, casually, without remorse, with remorse, shamelessly_

Alois Trancy rises from Jim Macken's ashes and kills the old man and frees the boys and is going to get what he wants. He sits in a manor that is now his, with a butler that is now his. Claude is all he has and Claude is not going to leave. Alois is the only Trancy that matters. Jim Macken is no more.

He tells himself that he matters.

“Yes, your highness. Yes, your highness. Yes, your highness.”

He is dying, but that's okay. Hannah loves him.

 

 

 

**Mediocre [Trancy, Alois]**

_please write [1] for “this statement is true” and [2] for “this statement is false” [3] for “this statement **could** be true” and [4] for “unsure”_

__ Alois Trancy needed to be loved  
__ All of this was done to him  
__ He stops bleeding  
__ Alois Trancy loves Claude  
__ Alois Trancy hates Claude  
__ Alois Trancy hates himself  
__ Alois Trancy loves  
__ There is good in everyone  
__ He is soul-temperature  
__ It's all right  
__ Hannah loves him  
__ Everything will be all right

 


End file.
